Update: 08/11/09 Okay so it turns out I was only 5 Weeks in this Ultrasound, which is why we didn't see the heartbeat yet! Yes, that is my first Ultrasound. I am 6 weeks pregnant and my official due date is March 23, 2010; one day after Joe's birthday. I am so excited, but please keep the prayers coming! My next appointment is August 13, 2009 so I will be sure to post an update at least by then.

Ultrasound

My first Ultrasound is Thursday at 2pm.

I AM SOOOOO PREGNANT!

Finally, the good news comes. My numbers went up! HCG was 280 and P4 was 68.9. I will officially be 6 weeks pregnant July 28, 2009 and hopefully will get my first ultrasound the end of that week. TODAY IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE....SO FAR!

Pregnant!

Well, I am pregnant once again. On 12 dpo (days past ovulation) my HCG was 20 and P4 was 46.2. That was on July 14th. I am taking another test on July 20th and I am praying that the numbers are continue to increase like they are supposed to. They are supposed to double every 24-48 hours.

BFP

Okay, I dont know if you can see this, but maybe if you click on the picture. It is very light, but I promise you, it is there.

If you read....

Well, I needed to vent my worries for a moment and I guess if you read my blog, then you will know before everyone else and if you don't then you will have to wait until I get ready to tell you. :) I got a very faint line last night and another very faint line this morning. I am only 12dpo, but I am saying a little prayer and waiting until 9am so I can call the doc. Say a prayer for me too.

Got My Blood Work Back

Okay, so I got my bloodwork back today and my Progesterone was 28, which is the highest it has ever been, including 17 when I was pregnant and I think only like 7 the first miscarriage. That is really good news, it means I had a strong ovulation, but does not indicate this early if I am pregnant. My Testosterone was 40 and anything under 50 is good, so I guess that isn't an issue. Don't know? He said that I can test on the 16th (CD 30) and if it is positive, then I come in and do the Quanitative HCG/Progesterone blood woek to confirm the pregnancy. Again, if it is negative, then I come in on CD 3, 4 or 5 and do more testing. Knowing me, I will probably start testing this weekend, just to see if I can see a faint line. Who knows, I haven't really been obsessing about it as much (usually much worse) but I cried all day today every time I typed anything or said anything and everything hurt my feelings. I even asked why someone didn't call me first to tell me something....whatever! LOL

First Appointment with Fertility Specialist.

Okay, my first post was super long and detailed and for some reason I got an error message and lost everything I had typed so I am sorry, but I am not doing it again. That is the main reason I got this Blog page so I would only have to type things once!!! Basically, he says he can get me pregnant and keep me pregnant. Insurance will cover it because he does not consider it infertility, but recurrent pregnancy loss. He feels that I could have PCOS due to 3 red flags: 1. Possible insulin definiciancy 2. Irregular periods 3. Family history of diabetes. He thinks this because he also THINKS that I may have elevated levels of Testosterone which causes you to ovulate late or not at all. If you ovulate late, you will miscarry every time, per Dr. McWilliams. He seems to be extremely optomistic. I had blood work done yesterday to test Progesterone/Testosterone (CD 22) and then on CD 3, 4 or 5 I will get an Endocrine Profile done and Insulin check. That's all you get. I am tired of typing!

Update on what's been going on...

Well, Monday (June 29) we had Colton and I was off work on Tuesday. Colton and I went to the pool in Newport and had lots of fun. We also went to McDonalds and ate lunch with Daddy. Wednesday morning I went to Dr. Faro's office and did a Post-Coital; google it if your interested, but it turned out good...LOL I also have my first appointment with Dr. McWilliams (Fertility Specialist) on Tuesday, July 7th at 11am and I am very excited to move into that next step. My wonderful husband is taking off work to go with me. I love him so much for supporting me through all this. Colton is going to New Braunsfels for the 4th of July.....hopefully he will be safe and have fun. We miss him so much already.

Same Shit, Different Day....does it get any worse?

My doctor just called me and said she finally spoke to that fertility specialist. The good news is that he said he never codes things as fertility and he wants to see me right away. The bad news is she told him that she felt I had Cervical Stenosis because of the fact that I had so much pain when we tried to do the HSG. He said he has never had a patient with Cervical Stenosis that did not have Endometriosis. See below: Association with InfertilityGenerations of gynecologists have recognized that among infertile women, endometriosis is relatively common. Probably between 25% and 50% of infertile women will have at least some degree of endometriosis present. It is easy to understand how someone with severe endometriosis, including dense pelvic adhesions, might experience difficulty achieving a pregnancy. More difficult to understand is why someone with one tiny endomtriosis implant on the sigmoid colon would also experience infertility. The answer may lie in the complexity of endometriosis. Rather than blaming endometriosis for the infertility, it is certainly possible that there is some other, yet unexplained factor, that predisposes the woman towards developing endometriosis and also predisposes her toward infertility. Severe cervical stenosis, for example could promote a large amount of retrograde menstruation (setting her up for endometriosis) and also interfere with normal sperm transport through the cervix (decreasing her chance of fertility). Anyways, I have to call him and set up and appointment. He said that he didn’t think my Progesterone levels were good and that he really wants to see me. He will be out of town next week, but the next week after that I guess I will try to set an appointment up for a consultation.

Bellies & Babies

Well, this just proves that every day is different with someone who has fertility issues. I work in at a law firm that has over 400 employees and I guess I was just chosen to have the desk right next to our collections department which is full of about 40 young girls, most of them NOT MARRIED and it seems like every week one is finding out that she is pregnant, or that it's girl, or that her due date has changed and it is like a stab in the heart with each word. I was doing really good this month, but then BOOM, I heard one say they found out yesterday that they are having a girl and I just want to crawl in a hole. To make matters worse, when I found out I was pregnant in November, so was my cousin and my husbands cousin....well my husbands cousin had hers June 19 and my cousin is going to pop any moment and it is just sad to see them with their bellies and babies and not have mine. Sorry....just having a rough day.

Just another month...

Well, after the 2 recent miscarriages, I would say that it is actually getting easier. I don't expect as much anymore and just pray for the best. I am back on the fertility meds and going to try a few other options. Hopefully the next few months will put an end to the long struggle, but if not, we will continue to try until we have exhausted all posibilities. I am so thankful to have such a great husband and a wonderful step son who has been in my life since he was 5 months old. I think of him as my own and always will. Hopefully one day I will be able to give him a little brother or sister, but I am going to try to live a little more in the moment for the sake of my sanity and everyone's around me. As always, keep us in your prayers. We are already so blessed.

2WW

Well, I am officially in the 2WW so say a little prayers for us. Thanks.

Memorial Day Miracle

Well, I will make an extremely long and emotional story very short. Joe and I woke up at 4am and headed to the ranch in Victoria; we got there around 10:30am and we were having a care free weekend. We had spent the day hanging out, riding 4 wheelers and we were up at the pool swimming and Joe got the call. He yelled at me that Colton had jumped in the lake while at his family reunion at Lake Tejas and was not responding and being life flighted to Memorial Hermann Childrens. We got from Victoria to Houston in 1.5 hours. When we got there, he was moaning and we knew he would make it, but we weren't sure if there were going to be any other complications mentally. Stephanie, Joe and myself stayed there all night except for when Joe and I went to WalMart to get him a blanket, superman PJ's and some other goodies and he slept the whole night; we didn't ofcourse. At 4am he woke up and was very testy but he was talking and he looked better. He was very alert for 30 minutes and then fell back to sleep. That is when Stephanie and I finally went to sleep for about 2 hours and then the miracle. Colton woke up about 7 or so and it was like nothing AT ALL had ever happened. He was running around, going to the potty, playing, watching DVD's, walked to the playroom, went upstairs to see the helicopter that he was life flighted in. It was a truly amazing sight. I laughed when the doctor came in because she said, "okay, he can go home. Regular diet, regular activity, there are no restrictions." I thought, yesterday he almost was taken from us and today it is like it never happened. God is so good!!!!! If you were praying for him, thank you so much.

Good Progesterone (17), Not So Good HCG (Neg)

Well, another month passes by... My progesterone was 17, which means that the supplements are working; however, my HCG shows that I am not pregnant. I now have to stop the Progesterone until after I start and end my cycle and then after ovulation, I will start it again. SOS, just a different day. Not so sure about the miracle OV Watch that I bought, I don't see how it is possible that I am not pregnant! GRRRRR I can't stand this. Oh well, bring on AF so I can start over AGAIN!

HCG/PROGESTERONE

Well, once again, I just got back from the doctor and had blood drawn to check my HCG and Progesterone, so now the wait......and wait.....and wait..... They need to have a regular "STAT" and they need to have a "Crazy Obsessive STAT;" mine would be the later. I am a bit of a pessimist this time, but I am trying not to be. I am just extremely tired and emotionally worn down. I need a vacation.

1 YEAR WEDDING ANNIVERSARY

Okay, well plans changed. Instead of going out of town, we decided to spend that money are do out yard and flower beds this weekend. Saturday I took my mom to the Garden Center to pick out plants for her flower beds and we spend Saturday and Sunday helping out my parents with some chores for Mother's Day. We did cook for everyone that evening and had the family over at the house. It was a good day.

TTC

Well, today is 8 DPO and I think I am feeling the signs already. As you all know, I had a miscarriage in November, 2008 and another in March, 2009 so please say a little prayer. I am extremely tired and although that may be from the Progesterone supplements, I "feel" prego. Anyways, I just started this blog because I noticed alot of people, including my friend Lesa had a site like this and I thought it was a neat tool to use to share what's going on.